river wild

cdo river
photos by totit

river wild collage

cagayan de oro - no sunshine, just a bit of rain and a river running wild. wow! God is good.

for the lonely people?

where was i? hmmm.. my blog says it's august 9 since my last post.. what had transpired all those silent days.. months..?? hehehe!! a friend of mine told me that she has been blogging for quite a while.. and she find it comforting.. pouring out her thoughts and her feelings... then she suddenly asked me... "mike..is this maybe because i'm lonely that;s why i'm blogging??... is blogging for the lonely people??"... i thought for a while and asked myself... "was i lonely when i was writing all those entries before??" hmmmm.. maybe i was.. hehehe....

i dunno... but i think it's not... coz now im blogging even i'm so much happy..

how do i love her?

And still all the love in my heart
Is like a raindrop to the sea
When compared to Your love for her
And thats why I ask You please
Will You teach me what she needs
I'm an earnest man
When it comes
To learning how to love this woman......

beautiful people

sundays spent at the beach... laughing out loud at the most frivolous jokes... at the corniest games... but with the loveliest people... whew!! being single can be no more fun than this....



*** again i'd like to acknowledge my good friend, totit.. our official photographer...hehehe! i didnt ask his permission to post all his shots here but i hope he won't mind...hehehe! ***

trek

drop-off point at kamakawan
photos by totit



cagayan de oro - my clock reads 5:30 a.m. and the daylight was already all over my room. the sun rises real early these days. i got up from bed and had my hiking backpack prepared for the days adventure. we (singles from our local church CCF) are heading to mapawa for a river trek.

today's a different monday, no wearing of barong and no boring office works instead im on a hiking apparel and a backpack loaded with food, a liter of water, an extra shirt and short pants.

the meeting place was at CCF by 6:30 a.m., i got there at exactly the agreed time. eugene was there at 6:10 a.m., and the rest came later with totet on a jeepney which will take us to the drop-off point at kamakawan, cagayan de oro.

the city was still very quiet coz it's a holiday. u can almost count the cars roaming around. of course u cant expect everybody to arrive at the agreed time, so we had to wait an hour for the late comers...

i particularly dont like to wait and watch time passed by doing nothing. i wasnt able to bring any book or my cellphone coz for sure it would get wet during the trek, so i just bought some banana's at the nearby fruitstand and ate. hehehehe! i only had taken two-slices of bread, an egg, juice, and two tablets of vitamins for breakfast.

after an hour of waiting they all arrived and we were set to trek the long trail of the mapawa river... there were 28 of us, most were first-timers except for totet who had been there several times and me who had been there once.. i had trekked the mapawa river almost a decade ago with my highschool friends dropping-off from villa ernesto in gusa trekking all the way to the cascading waterfalls of mapawa in libona, bukidnon.

today's a different trail, with different companions and a different me. nothing much had changed with the river though but a lot had changed in me. a decade ago i was a young boy, full of energy, running the river trails carelessly, and chasing my young dreams along with my friends. life was pretty simple those days, unlike now, a bit complicated. maybe because i have now taken responsibility of the welfare of not just my own life but other people that God had given me (my friends and family) as well.

we had reachd kamakawan past 8 a.m. already and the sun was already scorching but all were still in high spirits and full of energy. from kamakawan we had to hike almost a kilometer of downward mountain trail to reach the mapawa river. it was the first leg of the trail, the dusty mountain roads and the heat of the sun had welcomed us uncomfortably.... and for the first-timers, especially the ladies.. it wasnt as pleasant as what they think it is.

we had to stop and rest for 15 minutes after reaching the river. gathered around, shared jokes, food, and water. the mountains and the trees therein had covered the river and no more mr.-scorching-shunshine which drained much of our energies. the boulders, sedimentary rocks, trees, the sound of the river, of the insects and birds were very lovely which renewed our spirits....our energies regained and then the river trek started.

totet was our trek leader and kim and i were assigned as sweepers which means we had to be at the back and be at the last of the group to make sure no one's or nothing's left behind.. it was a simple task at first until eugene started getting exhausted and was way behind the the group already.

eugene didnt expect it was a very long trek and very difficult. another kilometer and his leg muscles started to gave in and he could no longer walk and even more, climb the very dangerous rocks.
i guess eugene weighs more than twice my weight... if i weigh 60 kilos then eugene should be more than 120. he was short and really a big guy... looking at eugene, i can already sense trouble. kim went ahead and i had to help eugene.

the group was way ahead of us and occasionally eugene and i had to stop for about 5 minutes or more to rest...i could no longer see or hear the noise of the group until we reach a very difficult climb. it was very steep, almost 90 degrees and about 15 or 20 feet climb. we caught some of the ladies still having a hard time climbing. it was over for eugene, and i know he cant make it any farther. we decided to settle and camp there until the group returns. i ask those guys we saw there to tell the group that we will just stay there and wait for their return.

and so the guys left us there (eugene and i). it was almost 11:30 a.m. and then eugene started to unload his bag, and to my surprise... it was all food...hehehehe! chocolates, nuts, chips..and drinks..hehehe! well, it wasnt such a bad luck after all. being left there with a funny guy with lots of foods and the thought that i no longer have to walk another kilometer was a blessing in disguise. we were also near a waterfall and we were covered with trees so it's really not a bad place to stay. well of course, the fun being with in the group still lingers in my head at that time but i cant leave eugene there all alone. so i just thought that i might as well enjoy the little detour that i am in. the food was my only consolation. heehehehe!

couple of minutes had passed and totet came back. he told us that the group was waiting for us. i told totet that we'll just stay there coz eugene cant make it any farther but totet insisted that eugene should try a little harder coz we're almost there at the end point of the trail. i looked at eugene and he was really tired but i cant keep the group waiting and i cant play the kj of the group by not joining them although my worries were more of eugene. i asked eugene to give it a try and surprisingly we had climbed the 15 or 20 feet and almost 90 degrees rock climb so easily. perhaps it's because we had rested for quite a while.

we started hearing the group cheering us up from a distance and some of them came along to help us. after a while we were able to join them and we then continued our trek. at long last we reached the end point..a waterfall. the rest of the group were already resting, eating, swimming, jumping and taking pictures when we got there. we were the last to arrive.

for more than an hour we were overwhelmed by the fun we had. our bond of friendship were strengthened and lots of new friends were gained.

yet the fun had to end and we had to get back to kamakawan before dark. we packed up
our things and headed back to where we started. the trail back became more hazardous because it started to rain. the rocks were now slippery and the water started to rise. climbing down the rocks were more difficult than climbing up.

reggie was helping eugene while i was clearing up the easy and safety trail. soon enough we have to deal with fatigue and fear that we wont make it on time. we spent almost an hour convincing eugene to move on because he was totally demoralized. more than the fatigue was eugene's attitude, he slowly became negative and pessimistic. for eugene, reggie and me, it was really a test of character.

God was so gracious. he reminded me of so many things and revealed my character on that day. at some point my character was about to break down, when i looked at the difficulties and the distance we still have to travel, plus the rain and eugene's attitude. God made me realized that if my character will falter that day then eugene's and reggie's would falter as well. so i just looked up to the heavens, enjoyed the rain, and we just sat there not worrying if will gonna make it home or not. we just started talking about our lives, and God's greatness.

we started talking about the love of our lives, and suddenly eugene gained new strength. until it hits me, his eyes lighted up everytime he speaks of the girl she really liked...so i keep on asking him about the girl and stuff.. then we started walking...in my mind i was shouting for joy coz i finally got him walking again... he only needs his inspiration...praise God!!! and reggie joined the conversation and then totet went back to help us.. all through out the trail back to kamakawan we were talking about eugene's love of his life...and we were just laughing and shouting that our situation did not hinder us from believing that we're gonna make it.

after finishing the river trail, we had to climb up again the uphill mountain trail. this time the the dusty road had turned into a slippery road. once in a while eugene had to stop for a rest but he was now determined to reach the top. i keep pushing him at the back and every step he made was a full of courage and inspiration.. it was already dark and still raining and halfway along the trail before it gets really steep, a mountain boy riding his horse came along our way. we asked him to let his horse lift our friend eugene back to kamakawan and we just have to pay him some money. he was delighted to help us after watching our exhausted faces which were about to cry.

once again, the group was cheering eugene as he approached the jeep riding on a horse.... they were so proud of him and i was so proud of him too. more importantly, i was so thankful to God.

we head home and called it a day.

ba-o (turtle)

sometimes i wish life would simply be like "taking a cruise to nowhere", but it's not. there are destinations to envision and journeys to take.

a friend of mine and I were having a conversation on women and relationships. we were exchanging views about the topic. my friend was a bit younger than me but he almost had a wider perspective than me when it comes to that stuff. (he must have read all those Joshua Harris' stuff..hehehe!)

we were then talking bout our experiences and the lessons we learned in the areas of relationship. i was laughing when he compared me to a turtle, and so i ask him why. he said, like a turtle who gets its head out of its shell then if something goes wrong it hides back, out then back, out then back, i decide on something yet when fear holds me back i easily retreat to my shell.. i lack the discipline and determination. and he was right...i was silenced.

i keep on telling myself to enjoy the journey and i tell others as well yet i failed to live up to that ideal. i have told myself many many times to have desire, decision, discipline and determination to pursue what God has put in my heart, but after all that's been said and done, there's far more said than done.

admittedly, i am like a turtle in some areas of my life, especially in relationships. i am still keeping those shells that i could comfortably run to when fear and doubt arises. my friend suggested to crush those shells so that i would have no other option but to trust God and move forward persistently towards that destination...

it makes me laugh when my friend calls me "turtle" in his Cebuano lingo..."ba-o!!!", i asked him to shout that word on my face everytime he notices that i am again exhibiting that attitude...i need to be constantly reminded.. hehehe! "ba-o!" Bisaya kaayo bai! hehehe! pero this one helps!

now i know where im weak at, God simply needs a turtle and a friend (who is not a turtle, hehehe!)to teach me those lessons. let's see what progress will i make in the coming days...

letters from a young missionary VI

Date: Tue, 24 May 2005 13:26:06 +0100 (BST)

Dio, Pre ug Bro

Bag-o pa gayod ako naka uli gikan sa Lampang, North Thailand. Nia na ako karon sa Chiang mai. Samtang didto ko sa Lampang, Nakig abin ako sa buluhaton didto nga gitawag ug HIV ministry. Buot ipasabot nga ang among gi alagaran mga biktima sa AIDS. Looy gayud sila kaayo kay nag antos pag ayu sa maong sakit.

Ngani natakdan raman pod ni sila (mga asawa gikan sa bana ug mga bata gikan sa inahan nga nagpasuso) ug gikan sa mga injeksyon nga gi recycle. Nakawali gayud ako kanila mahitongod sa kaluwasan....ngani malipayon silang naminaw.

diri gayod hinuon sa Thailand, bisag asa ka mulingi makakita ka gayod ug Buddhist Temple...ug makita mu gayud si Buddha kanonay uban sa mga nag gilak gilak nga mga estatuwa! Dinhi ang mga temple hilabihan ka expensive puno sa mga bulawan ug mga mahalong butang.

Ang simbahan diri ni Kristo gamay ray mga dagko ug gamay ray mga cathedral type building or protestant type building. Usahay dili gayod ganahan ang mga Thai musimba kay kompara sa ilang kanhi temple layo ang diperensya.

Apan salamat! aduna manpoy makasabot, ug midawat sa kristohanong pagtulon-an. Apan sa kinatibuk-an hugot gayod ang buddism diri 97 % gayod. Diri dili ka maka basta basta sa buddhism kay official religion gud nila, pwede nila ipa preso ang mga tawo nga sa ilang pagtuo nagbugal bugal kang Buddha..anyway kumusta manmo?. gusto pud ko maminaw ninyo!!!

------------

i received this email today and i realized that i am not the only one who would be encourage by these letters but fellow Christians as well.

letters from a young missionary V

Date: Mon, 16 May 2005 08:35:51 +0100 (BST)

Dio,
brod,
pre,

Maadjung adlaw kaninju!!

usa nako ka bulan diri sa Thailand ug ubay-ubay na usab akong na adto an diri....tulo na ka Orphanage run by pinoy pastors ang akong na duaw diri ngani duha niini ang akong naalagaran pinaagi sa kusog ug gigamit usab kita pagdasig kanila sa pulong. ( with interpreter of course).

Sa kalooy sa ginoo- niabot usab kita sa halayo nga bukid diin atu-a nagpuyo ang mga netebo nga gitawag nilag "Karen people" wala kita makawali apan sa sinyas-sinyas naka dasig usab kita kanila kay mga kristo hanon naman kadaghanan kanila. duna pay nagpatudlo ug english.

Naka himamat usab kitag daghang mga misyonaryo nga pinoy nga dunay tinuod nga tingoha nga mukaylap ang mensahi ni Kristo didto sa mga dapit nga wala ilha si kristo nga ginoo ug manlulowas.

Niabot usab kita sa Burma, ug akong nakita ang ilang kakabos dili lamang sa salapi kondili sa esperito. Pwerteng daghana ang ilang simbahan apan dili lagi si Kristo ang gisimba...ngani nag-gilak gilak ang bulawan sa ilang mga templo. Labina diri sa Thailand, bisag asa dunay templo ug pwerteng mahala ang mga dayan dayan.

Salamat kaayo sa inyong supporta kanako, hinaut nga gamiton pa kita ni kristo sa iyang tinguha nga luwason kadtong wala pa makadungog sa mensahi sa ebanghilyo (ni Kristo).....hangtod pako hunyo diri busa kaninyo naghangyo sa mga pulong nga makadasig niining atong pakigsangka sa gahom sa kangit- ngit.

dyoll noelag


------------------

this is the last e-mail i received from him... he now uses SMS when he needs support in prayers and to cheer him up pero 15 pesos man kada txt.. hehehe! the guy never lost his sense of humor and i am looking forward of hearing his testimonies when he returns home...

thanks a lot pareng Lloyd and may God bless you and expand your territories!

letters from a young missionary IV

Date: Tue, 3 May 2005 10:21:15 +0100 (BST)

Dio, pareng micheal

Salamat kayo sa inyong email nako. Dako kaayo kinig katabang aron muhunas ang akong kalaay. Nia gihapon ko diri sa Amihanang bahin sa Thailand ug tinood namuhat gyud ang dios sakong kinabuhi.

Karon pako nasayod nga grabe gyud diay ka daghan ang wala pa gayud makadungog sa mensahi ni Cristo. Diri lang, kay duol man mi sa border sa Burma ug Laos haskang daghana ang mga tribo nga wala gayoy nagwali kanila puros mga animist ug mga idolaters.

Sa China, nga pwede maadtoan diri. Duna diay duol sa kinintos ka mga tribo nga halos 90 to 100 percent wala gayod mawalihi ug wala gayod makailla ni Kristo. Ang ilang relihoyon Lama ug Buddist or Islam. Daghan man diay klase ang buddist.

Pastilan tinuod, the "harvest is truly plenteous but the laborers are few." karon nag open na sila sa gospel. I think this is the right time.
Paul said in Rom 10. "for everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved but how could they call on him whom they do not know? how can they know if no one is sent to preach them."

Karong dako ako burden nga ma reach out gyud ning mag tawhana. Ingon gud si Kristo nga sa iyang pagbalik tanang dila (sinultihan) tanang tribo mudayig ug musimba kaniya. Busa nagtoo ko nga iya gayud luwason tanang tribo sa dili pa siya mubalik.

letters from a young missionary III

Date: Mon, 25 Apr 2005 11:05:39 +0100 (BST)

Pare, Maayong adlaw kanimo. Nia gihapon ko diri sa Northern Thailand. Ang akong ministry ron nag atend kog cell group ministry diri unya nag OJT pod sa mga established na nga ministries diri. Medyo naglisod ko dirig adjust sa pagkaon ug sa language. Sa pagkaon pwerte halanga, misool ako almoranas, napay baho sa ilang pagkaon nga nga pwerte gyud!! pero giantos ko ang tanan. Lakip kamingaw

Wala nay makatupong pa sa pag-antos nga gihimo ni Kristo para kanato. Busa ako, maulaw ko mo-ingon nga nag-antos ko. Nasayod ko nga diko kabayran ang kaayo ug kaluwasan nga iyang gihatag.Pero kining ako pagtuman lang sa iyang sugo.

Dko gyud kalimtan kanang iyang tugon nga nag ingon: "this gospel of the Kingdom must be preach to all the nations and then shall the end come" ingon pa gyud siya: "Go and teach all nations, teach them to obey everthing I told you and I will be with u till the end"

Sa pagkakaron layo pa kaayo, there are 3.5 Billion people unreached by the gospel. 9 out 10 people in the unreached areas died without an oppurtunity to hear the gospel even once. That's very sad!! Islam is fast growing religion and so many others.

How can we enjoy so much with God's blessing when others are dying without Christ. I think in the Philippines we know so much about Christ but how about here?

way paglubad!!

Lloyd

letters from a young missionary II

Date: Wed, 20 Apr 2005 03:52:05 +0100 (BST)

Pare Gud morning,

Last night God reminded me that I did not came here for my own authority. I am sent by my Church and my success here depends on the covering of my Church.

I felt so lonely here because I cannot speak thai language, and have no friends yet. Recently I bought a bicycle as means of transportation to familiarize the place.

Thailand is very different from us, but its much the same as Japan.
I told you in my other email that Chiangmai is very strategic bcos its the pivotal road for China, Cambodia, Laos and Burma.

The engine of economy here is tourism.( To a Filipino who is seking for greener pasture without a doubt this is a land of opportunity for Him.) Para sako this land is for the harvest of soul. The harvest is truly plenteous here but anyway please guide me here sometimes Im confused.

I considered Pastor Jeph's (my receiving) ministry as very blessed. He seems to have the resources, he has many contacts and support from western people. (kining ako tagna-tagna lang sa kay maulaw ko mangutana) but anyway he told me that he has foreign supporter. I think God is good to him because of his faithfulness.

But I believe, Filipinos in Cagayan can support my initial work here. Ang problema lang diri ang first one year because of the learning of the language. There are many Filipinos here (ACM graduates who can offers help) they are also very successful in establishing churches here.

Anyway its too early to say!! But I think faith plus vision makes all the differences.


In Christ Service

Lloyd

letters from a young missionary I

i have always been proud of my friend Lloyd who is now in Thailand doing missionary work to preach the Gospel. i have made mention of him in many of my previous posts and i cant help mentioning him over and over again. he is one of the few people i've met who has a pure and servant heart.

i am a witness to his struggle between choosing to serve God and the comforts of the life he once had. i've seen him transformed into a man of character through the grace of God and i am always inspired by him.

i am posting few of his letters (e-mails) from Thailand that have inspired me, and i hope to encourage those who happen to read this post also. most of the succeeding e-mails were written in Bisaya, i hope i could translate it in English...but i dont have time so i'd leave it to the reader to do the translation... i would separate some of the letters in a different post and label it with its date of sending.

----------------------------

Date: Tue, 19 Apr 2005 04:58:31 +0100 (BST)

To Pastor Chris, dio elmer vale, pare michael, bro Alex and all my friends.

Sawatdi krap ka!! (hello)

Im here in Chiangmai, Northern Thailand. Im fine, thanks so much for your support. "Truly God is great!! God is good", I used to say it many many times but when I arrived in the field that statement became more meaningful.

I was blessed because before I came here I attended 2 days missions convention of Asians Centers for Mission (ACM) at Taguig. I've met a lot of Pinoy missionaries who do missions in the continents of Asia, Africa and Europe. All them echoed the same statement: " God is great and God is good."

I've also seen in Person international speakers like Peter Tokahira (missionary to Jerusalem who is now an Israeli citizen) he had written a book "Gods tsunami " I really recommend this book, Gordon Robertson of CBN Asia, and many great men in missions.

I agree with Tokahira, when he said the great exodus in the Philippines was authored by God. He said most jewish in Israel knows Christianity via their Filipino Care givers. ( the first people who received the gospel now become last to know ) He also said Filipinos are conquering the Arab continents. there are many secret followers there. Arab doesnt know this, what they thought as threat are the west not knowing they are already conquered by Christians.

Gordon Robertson being expert in History, proved to the audience that all great nations like Britain, American, France (known language for diplomacy) before becoming great they are the most missionary sending nations in the world. He even credited king Philip of Spain, That spain was once a powerful country because they made the propagation of the gospel a priority.

Magellan migth be a lousy missionary but remember in just one week after his arrival in Cebu in 1521 he baptized 800 people.( i cannot deny this Im fond of studying history) God used him even though he is not fit because mission is the heartbeat of God. God said whosoever call upon the name of God will be saved.

If no Magellan we are all muslim today or Buddist.

God really use blessing to bless other. Remember the Abrahamic Covenat in Genesis 12: God said to Abraham I will bless you so that all the nation of the earth will be bless through you. So the purpose of God's blessing is to share it to others. What happen when Isreal did not obey the mission. The bible is clear they are all scattered by force so that people from far away place can hear the message of salvation.(remember Daniel, nehemiah? )

Salvation should not be exclusive, it is for all people Read Ps 67. Truly God is calling Philippines (name after king Philip of Spain who sponsored missions to the east, also named after Philip the evangilist) to be a missionary sending country. If only we do mission long time ago, this diaspora should not have happened.

Dr. Robertson also said, the word "sent out" in the phrase " Pray to God of the harvest to sent out laborer to the field should be translated "Drive out" because its the same greek word used when applied to Jesus driving out money changer in the temple.

Therefore, Filipinos are driven out by God. Pinoy are Forced to do missions (this are our OFW) even though they are not fit (like magellan) because God concern is salvation should be share to all people.

We in Philipine claimed to be Christian. And the Bible said in Gal chapter 3: 29 (?) " if you are in Christ you are Abraham seed and heir according to the promise" What promise? go back to Gen 12: 1-3(?). the "promise of blessing" of course. I agree with Gordon Robertson that Philippines will rise again if he will obey his calling as missionary to his neighbors who are buddist, hindus and muslims.

Not all can go but all can support by advocating missions awareness, prayers, and mobilizing others.

GOD bless Philippines!!

PS Thailand is a very prosperous country!!! I wish Philippine be like Thailand

God bless you all! Thanks so much

seasons

we live, love, & learn.... :-)

summer rain

few days ago, i found myself standing in an ocean shore. there were dark clouds over the horizon yet there were also traces of sunshine behind it. i do not know if it's going to rain or it's going to be sunny.

yet i prayed that it wont rain that day, coz there were things i have to do and i feel that i only have that day to do it. also, i never liked the rain's chilling effect on me.

then i held back in anticipation which would come first, and to my delight...the dark clouds were slowly moving away and gone, gone from my sight. my heart lifted up and pictures of things (i'd like to do and should do) started to form in my mind.

but before those pictures were even completed, it caught me by surprise, suddenly the wind started blowing in a different direction. then the rain, that inconsiderate rain ruined my day, or maybe, it was my attitude that ruined my day.

coz i know that it is all beyond my control and i can still choose to be happy even if it did rained. despite this fact, i still find it hard to change my perspective, to change the way i feel about it, because it's not what i expected.

just like some circumstances in my life, some are beyond my control. there were days that started out so happy like there were sunshine all over but suddenly, in just a matter of an instant, in one single word, it turned out the way i dont want them to be...rainy.

im sure i cannot blaim it on the rain (unpleasant circumstances), i only have myself to blaim coz i allowed it to get inside me, and i allowed myself to affect others as well. coz whether i like it or not, it's still gonna rain.

at the end of the day...i fell on my knees and prayed. i asked God to give me a humble heart that could take whatever He sends me, sunshine or rain.

meantime, i'l just keep on breathing, for tomorrow the sun may rise again or maybe the rain will come and who knows what will God send me.

regardless of the weather, i will choose to be happy.

melancholy

i dunno how i got hooked with these stuffs... perhaps it's wired in my genes, having a melancholic temperament more often than not made me appreciate this kind of expression (poetry). these days though, i tried to think with my feelings rather than being mr. emo. hehehe! i just thought of someone and recalled these poems, i have memorized them line by line...

i need to take a nap.. kulang lang sa siguro sa tulog..

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
author: e.e. cummings
somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look will easily unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and
my life will shut very beautifully ,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;
nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

**************************

Unseen Beauty
author: unknown
In all of my journeys in search of something
I've walked alone, I've walked with companion
Seems like I still couldn't find it
But what was it then that I was looking for?
Who are you that I sought of?
On what realm do you belong?
Do you hide upon those mountains that I've climbed?
Or settle upon the depths of those pitiless oceans?
Are you somewhere I still have to travel?
Or are you somewhere I've already been?
Whether I will or will not find the answer
I know somehow, sometime and somewhere...
You and I shall be together.

the calling

today is the last day of March! whew! i'd like to post one entry before it's all gone. the past few days have been silent. i scanned my planner to see if there's any significant event that occured during those days but nada! ala!.

ah! last tuesday was Cris' birthday, had dinner with the cell group at the OIC. boy! i was able to see my PBA idols from the Talk 'n Text, wow!! i only see those guys on TV but last tuesday, i was lining up at the buffet table with them. they're here in cdo for out-of-town game today at XU gym. the guys were so cool and ang lakas kumain, i think i only had 2 servings pero 5 yata bawat isa sa kanila, hehehe!

and i also had a great holiweek, a retreat and a sunrise service during the Easter.

be joining later with my thursday bible study group.

today also will be Lloyds' last day at work, by next week he'll be in Chiang Mai, Thailand for a 2-month mission. the guy was so excited and often tells me that this trip will be the turning point of his life.

this guy has been very influential in my spiritual and personal growth. he was the one who encouraged me to read good books, and he often lent me his favorite books, which i am now stucked into. it is true indeed that along ur journey you will meet people who will help you build ur character. Lloyd has pursued his greater calling , and i am yet to find mine. :-)

think

 

sow a thought, reap an action
sow an action, reap a habit
sow a habit, reap a character
sow a character, reap a destiny.


everything started with a seed of thought, everything will then have its compounding effect. :-)


"you cannot travel within and stand still without"
- James Allen

detours

the past two days were among those paid vacations i have been enjoying with the government. government people call it "planning workshops, congress' and blah blah blah".

it's not that i am a disgruntled government employee, never was, but the past two-days added to the lists of those lavish spending habits of the government. oh well, as if i'm new to this kind of system. it would be justifiable if in return excellent outputs were materialized... and i have nothing more to say to that.. hehehe!

and so we spent two-days at the Camiguin Highland Resort, a little of work and a portion of vacation. nakakatuwa kasama yung mga matatanda... daming reklamo, sa pagkain at sa kung ano ano na lang...hehhe! ito pah, kala nila na the hotel we're staying was Camiguin Island Resort, eh Highland pala, eh di sa bundok.

while we're on the van, sayang saya nila to see the beautiful beaches, eh nung papunta na kami sa hotel..halos sabay sabay silang nagtanong sa driver "oi! ba't papalayo na tayo sa beach?? ano ba to?? hindi pala Island, Highland pala!"hehehe!! gusto ko na sanang magtanong "ano bang pinunta niyo dito?? trabaho o ang beach?? eh alam ko naman ang sagot, di ko na lang itinuloy! eheheh!

most of the participants were from Manila, first time to be in Camiguin. disappointed talaga sila sa venue... ba't daw sa bundok, gusto pa naman nila ang beach.. hehehe! eh 4 km from Mambajao yung hotel.. but all in all the trip was great. oh well at least for me. :-)

rockstar

rob thomas 

matchbox20 minus rob thomas... pinag-tripan ba naman si rob thomas...inalis sa picture...kaput!!! at pinalitan ni mike tuyan... hehehe!??

i used to be an alternative rocker....heheh! alam mo yung taong.. who acts like a rocker, get's up like a rocker, talks like a rocker...and hangs out with those wannabe-rockers like themselves???

feeling ko talagang cool na cool ako noon when i go out with my barkada's, wearing sunglasses kahit madilim na, t-shirt at jeans na kupas, long hair, goatee at balbas ala-mr.suave... then inuman-marathon hanggang umaga... uwi sa bahay, matulog, tatawag na naman ang barkada...inuman na naman...

that was me few years back..hehehe! jobless, hopeless, purposeless, loveless...hehehe daming "less"sa buhay ko.

ang gusto ko lang siguro gawin sa time na yun maging rocker....hehehe! rock mp3's?? u name it!!

i was actually taking a "road to nowhere"... until i got tired of it and God found me. :-)

now i winch everytime i hear my cousins playing and singing along with the same music i did before, talks, and dresses like a rocker... oh no!! soon enough these guys will be in places where i used to find myself drunk, jaded, and wasted... and they too think it's cool..

i was talking to my cousin a few days back.... he likes to borrow stuffs from me, mp3's, cd's, my chuck taylor shoes, yung mga t-shirts ko na mga pang-rocker kuno, and how he's fond of asking me my days in college when he used to see me looking like a rocker... oh no!! i need to guide this child or he'll be taking the same road i took before...

just recently i found out he joined a fraternity...boy!! he's just about to enter college..and now i was so surprised to see both his ears pierced... oh no!! i never pierced my ear when i was a wannabe-rockstar...

now i find myself counseling my little cousin, and the need to guide him not to become another wannabe-rockstar but to enjoy the seasons of his life with godly friends, with his family, and for him to find his purpose, as well as for him to grow towards his God-given potentials.

good thing he listens.... when i told him.... dont u dare take another step closer towards that path, i took that road before, i've been there!!...

now i'l keep praying...and hope that i will now be a good model for him.

attitude matters

okey, i only got 5 minutes for this entry. heehehe! i'm learning to master my time.. i can see a pattern here already... it seems like this is going to be a weekly journal... yeah it is... i see entries for monday only... oh well, at least im still not abandoning this journal. :-)

"all is well that begins well"
so to start my week, i have it all planned and scheduled.. blogging is not part of it but i guess i can spare 5 minutes. besides, a few people would like to know how am i doing...

my attitude is what keeps me smiling these days... i am so amazed how u can alter ur situation by altering ur attitude of mind.. i guess this is one of the greatest truths God has taught me...

how can a man like Job, Joseph, and Paul remain in God, enjoy their journey, and even exhort other believers to "rejoice in the Lord always, and again, i say rejoice" even they themselves were suffering??? were they out of their mind??? hmmm... how did they sustain themselves, remain humble, and accomplished what God had set before them? amazing!!!

i remember sharing this to a friend and she told me "that's weird mike!! how can u say that the journey is as enjoyable as the destination when ur suffering??" i just smiled coz she still didnt get it... she didnt see the whole picture... we have different perspective...

i shall be telling myself over and over again during the course of this journey "when all else fails, attitude matters..."

pay now and play later

i feel so fulfilled as i walked down the corridor of XU graduate school and submitted two of my final case analyses at the MBA office last saturday (march 05, 2005). wow!! how time fly so fast!! one semester has just been completed.. di ko man lang namalayan...

so far, i am enjoying this journey that i recently embarked on... the new friends that i gained, the time we spent on coffee shops and fastfoods discussing cases, the debates during class, and our weird professors who have their distinct odd behaviours...hehehe!

although i missed my saturday basketball games, my afternoon at the movies or beach or a good book, my thursday bible study group in our local church CCF (u just wait guys coz im coming back na! heehhhe), and of course a great deal of my limited income...but it's worth it. the process i went through during the first semester of my MBA taught me lessons of persistence , determination, and focus...i'm still practicing these principles though but the journey in itself has brought me enough joy already...

i realized that one way or the other i need to learn these things.. it's always been my fervent prayer that God will always remind me of my purpose... that my eternal perspective will always dominate my thoughts and heart... and that i should enjoy this process that i am going through...

i know God is training me to be strong... so that i would be able to take care of the people that i love, who will be going along with me in this journey. so that i will be able to help others find their way also...so that i would be able to complete this earthly journey with a smile :-)! and then fly farther...

this is going to be a long journey... i'l just face them one day at a time.

japanese, vietnamese, & potatoes

this is one of my favorite shots (below). this was taken last 2003 at the Miarayon Region of the protected area of Mt. Kitanglad, when i was still working with the Information Division. at left is our researcher from the Department of Agriculture, Allan Bacho talking to our farmer-cooperator (right) in our project on White Potato Production. i dunno exactly what they're talking about, perhaps about potatoes..hehehe!

i have to wrap my camera with a cellophane coz of the fog... and look at those white potatoes...u dont see them right??? hehehe! of course coz they're rootcrops, but those two guys (left - allan, who looks like a japanese, right- farmer, looks like a vietnamese)were standing on that green potato fields.

i've been in the protected area three times and each time i was there, it was like always the first time.. the indigenous people and the way they lived fascinates me, and also the extremely cold weather.



japanese, vietnamese, & potatoes 

alay-lakad atbp.

i am suppose to have a half-day off from work today coz i joined the motorcade for the Fire Prevention Month early kanina... but still i have to be in the office to finish some pending jobs. i woke up at 5 am coz the the motorcade starts at 6 am. i have to wake up and be there at C.M. Recto Avenue at exactly 6 or else i would have to ride the fire truck during the motorcade. hehehe!

yesterday, i submitted my letter of apology to our director for missing the ALay-Lakad last February during the Heart Month Celebration. actually, di talaga ako nagising noon kasi 5 am ba naman magstart yung Alay-Lakad. Ba't naman kami lang lagi ang ipinapasali pag may ganitong activities??? lagi nalang ako!! ako!! ako!! hehehe! kasi naman.. average age ng employees sa office namin ay 50 years old yata... so ayun.. kami na lang (young people) lagi gigising ng maaga para mag-Alay-Lakad atbp..! di ba mas kailangan ng mga matatanda yung exercise??? hehehe!

****

just doing some snapshot on my screen. u can actually do this using u'r keyboard, try pressing the key "PrintScreen" then whatever is active on ur screen should be saved on the Clipboard.. just paste it on whatever photo editor u have.


snapshot 

wedding & planner

it's been a week since i made my last entry in this blog. where was i?? ah, been out of the office most days pala during last week.

it is true indeed that u'r attitude at the beginning of a task will determine its outcome, eh, i was beginning to feel lazy in writing and i succumbed to that feeling.. so ayun... gusto ko pa naman sana na daily yung entry ko dito.

nothing so significant happend to me during the week except for my friends' wedding last saturday.

"i do"
and so my friend kristi got married eventually. it was my first time to be in a Christian wedding. i came late, and when i got there, they were about to say their i do's.. and so they did, exchanged vows and kissed.

i was having fun looking at my single-folks friends, who, by the look in their eyes, were also wishing they'l be next in line.. hehehe! most of them were already in the marriageable age.

i dunno what got into me but i suddenly realized i am becoming one of them... one of those "single-folks".., oh my, i've never entertained the thought of getting married but now it seems like it's slowly becoming a reality.

Lord give me enough patience! :-) .

oh i lost my daily planner! last saturday during the reception. how could i??? i was so careless, it was so important to me.. oh well, good thing i have an extra planner...the one tita Cris gave... sayang din yung planner ko ha...dami pa namang important events na naisulat ko dun.. sana lang kung sino man nakakita ng planner ko ay isauli yun sa 'kin..

googles

i had a great weekend! wish i have the time to write it all here! a bit busy today...

a picture is worth a thousand words... hehehe! tinatamad ng magsulat!



i'm not the only one...staring at the ___!  

first photo blog

just trying to work on the aesthetic part of my online journal... all text could sometimes or more often than not be boring!... hehehe...



good old friends...literally...hehehe 

indecision

in·de·ci·sion n. Reluctance or an inability to make up one's mind; irresolution.

today, i played basketball with my bro, we had two games in a row. havent played for couple of months now because of my hectic sked, but today... i had a few.. make that two. i wanted to exhaust and tire myself today.

last night, i have to talk to a friend. i really need someone to talk to for my sanity's sake, heheeh! all went well.. at the end of our talk, still i am indecisive.

how about solving this issue using the case method?, the one they teach in our MBA??? hmmm.. hehee! kinda systematic approach...
i. problem statement
ii. objective
iii. areas of consideration
iv. alternative courses of action
v. conclusion.

or better yet pray...

i guess the latter is what i need right now.

i just have to get over myself.. yes...that's what i need to do..

"u'r too old to cry, but it hurts too much.. to laugh.."

pano' na to??? oks lang... kaya ko to!! nandyan naman si Lord! :-)

no questions asked

"if Jesus were to stand in front of me and say, "Follow me," what would be the first thoughts that would pop into my mind?

Lord, i still have my case analysis due later and it's not yet finish, can i just have an hour or two to finish it before i'l follow You?

i could only face the ground in shame after realizing that i've been burnd-out with such activities in work and school lately that i tend to forget that i have to spend time with God. my prayers seem like i am just saying "hi" and "hello" to God, and it's no longer like it's "the sweetest thing i know".... i'v compromised my time to read His Word when i run out of time to do my activities in school...

Matthew 9:9
Matthew got up and followed Him.

I like that guy Matthew, after hearing Jesus' two words "Follow me"...he just got up and followed Him and no questions asked.

"today matters"
i realized my mistake, now i need to review, readjust, and re-enter... listen and obey God and No Questions Asked!

***from today on, OUR DAILY JOURNEY will be helping me in writing this Journal.... so that i would be reminded that i should be living in His purpose and for His glory alone!

much afraid

i'm feeling so down today, feeling so weak, so defeated, so alone. i feel like it's gonna rain today. i see no sunshine. oh i just feel so weak..

... siguro kulang sa vitamins???? hehehe! i will still choose to be happy!

"Much Afraid"
by Jars Of Clay

Empty again
Sunken down so far
So scared to fall
I might not get up again

So I lay at your feet
All my brokenness
I carry all of my burdens to you

[Chorus:]

All of these things
I've held up in vain
No reason nor rhyme
Just the scars that remain
Of all of these things
I'm so much afraid
Scared out of my mind
By the demons I've made
Sweet Jesus, you never ever let me go
Oh, sweet Jesus, never ever let me go

So happy to love
Yet so far to go
You lead me on to where I've never been before

[Chorus]

"today matters"
a song or two will make me feel better... oh God help me!

my own boss

my boss is out for about a week, and that means i am my own boss for about a week also. hehehe! i've been listening to this audio books by robert kiyosaki about financial freedom lately. his principles were very good but the disciplines of getting it done and practicing it in the real world is the main obstacle i have to hurdle. the gap between knowing and doing is just too painful to overcome...it really needs desire, decision, and discipline to get to your goals. the audio book was about the four classes of people: employees, self-employees, businessmen, and investors, and of course i belong to that first category. the main point he was driving at is that these people are so different in terms of financial intellegence, emotional intellegence, and systems intellegence in view with money. whichever category you decide to belong would determine your financial freedom. i have read also his book rich dad, poor dad which greatly influenced my thinking and as crazy as it may sound to my coworkers and friends...i decided not to become an employee for the rest of my life.

"get-rich plan"
my friend Lloyd and i were talking last week over coffee about this book by Napoleon Hill (Think and Grow Rich). Hill was a protegee of Andrew Carnegie who was one of the richest person during his time. Andrew Carnegie's principle was to spend the first part of his life accumulating wealth and the second part giving it all away...he later then revealed some of his secrets how he did it. we keep on laughing about the idea of Hill but somehow there were good points about it. we later agreed that the money is just a tool to help other people and one should not be stucked in addiction to it. "where ur treasure is, there ur heart will be also". ,

Lloyd is slated for a mission in Cambodia in a month or two, he was telling me that if it's God's will for him to stay there then he would be willing to give up his career in the government as well. Lloyd is second in rank in the information division, we had the chance to work together before i was transferred to the Regional COmputer Unit. he is already 34, with a stable job and a very promising career, with a beautiful and loving wife, although they were not blessed with a child. in a month or two also he will probably become the new chief of their division if ever the acting chief would be approved for migration in the U.S. wow! i am so inspired and encouraged by the commitment of this guy to leave his comfort zone and do God's work. hmmmm.... ???? :-)

"today matters"
yahoooo!!! i can play my favorite songs today!! sana ganito na lang lagi - ako ang boss! heheheh!

a conversation with a farmer

i had this little conversation with my uncle as he was hitchin' a ride on my way to the office today. i've known him since birth, his house is just in front of ours, & in the same compound. he did not use his multi-cab today, which he uses to visit his farm in Baungon, Bukidnon. today, he's going to visit his farm in Gingoog City. when i was a kid i idolized this guy, he was young, smart, and full of dreams. he lived in his own house, has a promising career with the government at the National Irrigation Agency, he was a bachelor then. he has two college degrees (Geodetic and Civil Engineering), he pursued his studies during day while tending in a bar at a hotel during night time. When i started my service with the government, i remember him telling me his past experiences and what-could-have-been if he continued his service with the government. he actually resigned from office at the peak of his career and took a job offer from a British construction company doing a very big project in Malaysia. after a year or two of working abroad, my uncle returned and gave up his job in Malaysia as well. the reason???? woman, he cant stand working from afar and not being with the love of his life. and so he choose to stay in the Philippines and got married and had 3 kids. after resigning from his job in the government and the British company, my uncle started his own business, a mini-grocery store. he was successful for a while but then it did not flourish, he was not a businessman, he was trained as an employee. when the kids are growing and bills are growing as well, he never resorted to becoming an employee again, instead he is now a noble farmer.

"lessons learned"
my uncle is no longer the tough and handsome guy i used to idolized, he is now old, thin, but still smart. of course during our talk in the car, it was all about agriculture, and stuffs... before i could reach the office he askd me to pull the car over coz he will be taking the jeep from there to the the terminal. he thanked me and i said no probs uncle! as i watched him go with his back-pack and stuffs for the farm.
as i reached the office, parked the car, and then i thought for a while about my uncle... then i had this lessons learned: what we are today, it's because of our decisions in the past! my uncle's motivation now is his kids (3 boys), and i can see the glow in his eyes as we were talking bout his eldest who is now about to graduate in highschool. it doesnt really matter where we are now, what matters is in what direction we are moving.. my uncle is now a Christian and also his whole family (just last year)... that's what i am most thankful to GOd about!

"today matters"
Lord give me strength & wisdom for the day!

in a rush

i was rushing to CCF this morning coz im already late for the SUnday service. i dont have the habit of being late actually but earlier my papa, and my bro, asked me if i would want to go with them to the beach. i looked at the wallclock and it was only 8:30 a.m. and since sunday service is at 10, so i nodded and took with me Mr. Wesley, my dog. besides, it;s been a while since we've gone out together and bond. it such a great feeling if it;s low tide coz i can run up to Bayabas (adjacent beach in Bulua where we are) with my dog, and if the waters are high i still can cross all the way to Bayabas but we really have to swim our way. we've been doing this everytime we go there. the beach was great and the waters were very cold, and i was enjoying it that i almost forgot the time. i actually reachd home at 10 and took a quick shower and dashed my way to CCF. it was 10:20 on my watch but just in time they started the praise and worship, hehehe! nakahabol pa rin. grabe, 20 minutes lang....hehehe!

"p.u.s.h."

Dok Allan's message was still in the book of 1 Peter and it was great! he actually ended-up his message with this word "p.u.s.h.", it means pray until something happens. i remember my friend Kristi giving me this bookmark which carries with it that same acronym. now i rememberd Kristi, it's been a while since i saw her after resigning from D.A. and took an Non-GOvernmental Org. job at Xavier University. She was actually among those Christian friends who encouraged me to be strong and keep my faith in God during my trying times. She called me a few weeks back telling me she's getting married! wooohhh! i was surprised! she was asking me to be the emcee during the reception but i declined, i told her that i knw someone who can do it better... it's Mr. Edwin Elorde, the bestman of her husband-to-be. i have the chance to meet these guys during highschool, they were the tough guys, the cream of the crop. Kristi actually didnt think of that and so she thanked me of my suggestion. hehhe! actually i was partly finding an excuse, but still i told her that if Edwin would decline as well then i can be a proxy. Kristi asked me to promise though that i should be on her wedding day. i hope Kristi made the right decision, i'l just keep on praying...

"today matters"
i was pretty tired with my activities this morning at the beach, the running and swimming stuffs so i guess i might spend some time in bed this afternoon, and as usual i have to prepare our case analysis for tomorrow. happy weekend mike!

saturdays

ever since i enrolled in the MBA Program, Saturdays are no longer exciting! well it used to be! it used to be the day where i can spend it at the beach with my dog, reading a good book, watching movies, and basketball. now those days are gone! heeheh! it's not that i dread it but Saturdays have become the day where i have to finish all my pending case analysis'. discussing cases over coffee shops, over fastfood chains, and in the school lobby have become the norm these days. at the sunny side of this shift of priorities, i learned to value time.

"a piece of advice"
i once talked to this good friend and officemate of mine, he's about 50 years old. i ask him how he was able to finish his Doctors Degree in Public Administration while keeping his daytime job... then he grab this piece of scratch paper, turned it upside down and started writing at the clean portion of the paper (he does that all the time). he actually wrote a time-management plan for me....after asking my activities. at the end of that busy schedule he then reminded to allocate time to relax..be it with my friends or my family or my dog....or even just with myself. that was a good advice...now i make it a point that no matter how busy i am, i have to spend time with my friends, my family, and myself as well.. thanks to Dr. U.O for that piece of advice!

"today matters"
as i was saying, i am about to go to Dunkin DOnuts to meet my classmate, discuss two cases and write our analysis, we have to defend one in our class tomorrow. hooooo! it's gonna be a tough day yet still i will choose to be happy! hehehehe!

slow starter

i intentionally woke up at 3 a.m. to write my case analysis, and i did. the alarm clock rang and i get out of bed. so quiet, u could even hear a needle drop. i said my morning prayer of thanksgiving to God for the new day, new challenges, and new opportunities. this is my 4th or maybe 5th attempt to do my case analysis during this time of the day. and much like my previous attempts, it was futile. as i took my pen and piece of paper to write the outline of my analysis, nothing seem to come out of my brain. my precious brain doesnt seem to cooperate, it wont work, despite how much i wanted to get it started. after a while, i found myself in dreamland!


"pareto principle"
after recalling this (20/80 principle), i realized that my productive hours starts at 8 in the morning till noon then slows down and starts to activate late at night. i just cant force my brain to work beyond those hours or more than 20 percent of my day which gives me 80 percent of my output. so in order to have my case analysis ready by 6 pm today i have to take a half-day off in the morning and true enough i was able to write my case analysis.

"today matters" my attitude today has helped me achieved my goals for the day. although i had difficulties in writing my case analysis because i wasnt able to join our group discussion but at the end of the day, i still learned my lesson...."prioritize or agonize"...

my first

it's about time i should be writing something into this blog. it's been quite a while since i created this but just now that i decided to write, i call it my first . wow! medyo iba yung dating ng title ah! hehehe! dami ko yatang naiisip and naaalala sa title na yan. i was thinking of writing my blog at the start of every day instead of doing it at the end of each day, hmmmmm... that seems to be a good idea...besides, my brain works faster at the start of each day. so what;s with today??? i skipped traffic, it's such a great feeling to start my day going smoothly down the road all the way to my office with no stop lights to bother me. whew!! it actually saves me 45 minutes of boring traffic. i actually went out of my house at exactly 7 a.m. and my office hours starts at 8 a.m., the one hour allowance was for the sometimes-uncontrollable-traffic! but today, i saved 45 minutes of that one hour... and it also means im 45 minutes earlier in my office, which gives me some time to blog! what a way to start my day!!!

"yesterday ended last night"
what about yesterday?? we had our pre-valentines party with my "singles" friends at our local church, CCF, there were quite a number of invitees...quite a number of beautiful people too... Dok ALlan and Miss Blissy's love story was one of a kind.. it inspired me and im sure the others as well. Dok Allan's 3 M's in his life were spectacular.. these are, Master, Mission, and Mate, may hierarchy yun ah.... di pwede magskip sa hierarchy.. sa palagay ko im still working out and would be doubling my time doon sa second hierarchy... Mission para makapunta na ako doon sa Mate... im 25 last year, turning 26 this year, okey lang din naman yung sabi ni Dok Allan na maging BTR na lang ako o Bachelor Till Rapture. scary thought... hehehe! oh well i guess that's it...

"today matters"
there's a lot of PC's lined up to be fixed today, not to mention my 17-page case analysis in my MBA which is due on friday, and my Quanti exam on thursday... oh well, i'l just deal with what i need to do for this day! Give me enough strength for the day Lord!